This is the question that has plagued us for months and mostly in the summer, when everyone else was enjoying the sun and relaxing after the first wave of the pandemic. That’s when we decided to stop the premieres, at least for the vacation, we said. Cinepub, like all other small, fragile, naive, idealistic and confusing bodies, faces major problems and shortcomings. We are  used to the shortcomings, they are part of our primary DNA, and the problems have not scared us for years, why would they do it now? But rather – and therefore much worse – it was the shadow of existential doubt: does it make sense to live anymore? Year after year, however, probably due to seasonal depression, the doubt returns.

When the autumn-winter settled and the gray replaced the colors, and the cold penetrated our bones and souls again, every morning the question reverberated between the walls that had become both mother and plague; home, and office. Then came the Halloween-type blows, such as the meetings initiated by an institution that invited us to a round table discussion with representatives of major VOD and SOD platforms.

The invitation seemed honorable: if these highly placed individuals look at our little F(ree) VOD, that meant they appreciated us, didn’t they? Well, no. Goliath had only noticed that David existed, he didn’t respect him at all, much less to sympathize with him. It’s invigorating to know that someone wants to kill you, just when you’re thinking of committing suicide. Well, aren’t things getting simpler? When does someone else make decisions for your life? I was looking at the participants in the discussion and I was thinking: what are we looking for here? They are employees. We are volunteers and idealists. When the evil they are today preparing for us, even unconsciously, will happen, many of them will then no longer be employed by the companies or institutions they represent today. They are mercenaries. We are soldiers without pay, without a foreign legion and without supreme commanders.

Then came the holiday season, that suspended time when you do things you haven’t done all year. Such as – for example, – reading or writing letters. And the messages on YouTube were worse than the conversation mentioned earlier. It was obvious that those who commented on the movies as if they possessed the absolute truth and the ultimate axiology, or those who admonished us as if we were a public service obliged to answer in real time, are only a tiny part of our viewers. And that the others, who love and love us, are the silent majority. But that doesn’t mean we wouldn’t have liked to read more beautiful messages and encouragement than swear words.

It’s true, because we don’t have funding, and our team is tiny, we don’t do “community management” properly. And no “social media” as it should be. But we give with all our heart, with love, everything we have best. Cinepub learned us that there is no audience, but audiences. That what some like, others do not and vice versa. But that every movie has its audience. There are movies on Cinepub that we like or dislike. But we love them all equally!

We created Cinepub when realized that nothing makes sense for a filmmaker, if his film does not reach as many people as possible. Some will hate it. Others will swear at it. But most will love it. And so we answered the existential dilemma and closed the cold depression: so that’s the reason for us to exist – for those who love.

Because, as the great Professor George Littera once taught us, you have to enter the cinema as a spectator, not as a critic; as a moviegoer, not as a filmmaker. Openhearted and letting yourself be embraced by emotion, without prejudices. Kibitzers? We have enough.

Cinepub is for anyone, but not for everybody. For those who love, not for those who strike. But about all this, again and differently, next time…

Lucian GEORGESCU | January 2021 | cinepub.ro